* Thrift Center, Week 2 *

Wifey dragged me back to the Thrift Center for their Monday 99 cent sale this morning. Since I didn't have a fire to investigate or a truck to wash (I screwed up and washed it Sunday), I wondered around the store looking for bargains and instead found " I'm Talking To Myself" lady from last week. I have now come to the conclusion this is one disturbed person. I decided to follow her around the store to see what entertainment she might provide. I know you might say I'm stalking her. You might be right. But she does provide me with a wonderful source of blog material. She chooses a blouse from the rack, pulls it over the blouse she's already wearing, and goes over to the mirror and looks at herself. She never shuts up the whole time. It seems this week she is conversing with herself at a lower volume than last week. She stands there a good 5 minutes jabbering with herself about wheather this blouse looks good on her. 'Is this sleeve too long?" "Does this collar look right?". She asked herself these questions several times over. I finally got bored with the whole thing and went out to my truck and read the USA Today sports section. I went back inside a while later and found my lovely wife on her way to my FAVORITE section of the store, the fitting rooms. I plopped my butt down in a chair and waited for the show to start. And folks, it didn't take long. Wifey pops out of the dressing room with a nice black dress on and asked me how it looked on her. Why the hell she thought a bored out-of-his-skull 54 year old man dying to get the hell outta that store would have a decent opinion on a black evening dress is beyond me, but I smiled and nodded my approval, and back in she went. A lady standing there beside me who was waiting to get a room smiled at me, for being a thoughtful husband I guess, a room opened, and in she went. Wifey is STILL in her room, and all of a sudden this other woman pops open her door and looks at ME and motions to the pants and top she had tried on and asked me if they looked alright on her. Look ladies. I came in here for a show, not to judge a fashion parade. But being the gentleman I am, I shook my head in disapproval, and back in she went. In all fairness, it DID look awful on her, like my opinion really matters. I guess it did to her. At this point, I'd had enough. On my way outta the store, I did find a really nice brass and crystal chandelier for 99 cents that's should fetch me at least a hundred bucks on eBay. Out the door Wifey and I went to search for a fire so we could have lunch.